Hillary’s Alien Baby And 7 Other Out-of-This-World Tabloid Tales

The Clintons’ long relationship with extraterrestrials—ripped from the pages of the Weekly World News.

The star reportWeekly World News/Google Books

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UFO enthusiasts are hoping that a Hillary Clinton presidency would blow the lid off the government’s alien conspiracies. But the shocking truth about Hillary’s affinity for aliens is already out there—in the pages of the Weekly World News, the spoof tabloid best known for its tireless coverage of Bat Boy. Throughout the ’90s and early ’00s, the WWN documented—alright, fabricated—the Clintons’ political alliances and personal dalliances with extraterrestrials, including Hillary’s on-again, off-again boyfriend P’Lod.

Some highlights of the WWN‘s Clinton-alien exclusives:

Take me to your leader: In 1992, an unnamed alien passed over President George Bush and Ross Perot to endorse presidential candidate Bill Clinton, kicking off the Clintons’ tumultuous relationship with interplanetary visitors.

Weekly World News/Google Books

 

Quid pro UFO: Following Clinton’s election, the alien gave the president-elect a joy ride in his spacecraft, sparking speculation that he might be up for a position in the earthling’s administration.

Weekly World News/Google Books

 

Brother from another planet: In June 1993, the Clintons adopted the infant survivor of a UFO crash, whom they named John Stanley Clinton. An observer told the WWN, “He will almost certainly be educated and groomed for a life in public service.”

Weekly World News/Google Books

 

Contact with America: The extraterrestrial power broker soured on Clinton and met with Newt Gingrich in 1995, offering his endorsement if the then-House Speaker ran for president.

Weekly World News/Google Books

 

Alien versus predator: In 1999, Bill Clinton caused an intergalactic diplomatic incident when he groped a “shapely female alien.”

Weekly World News/Google Books

 

Lust in space: For Valentine’s Day in 2002, Hillary’s alien boyfriend P’Lod gave her a pair of “extraterrestrial undies.”

Weekly World News/Google Books

 

50 shades of gray: In 2003, the recently jilted P’Lod penned a tell-all book in which he recounted “alien-style lovemaking” with his ex.

Weekly World News/Google Books

 

Earth girls are easy: Reunited with Hillary, P’Lod shared his tips for romancing terrestrials, like licking your partner: “Gene Simmons aside, very few humans are blessed with a 16-inch tongue like mine.”

Weekly World News/Google Books

 

Neither the anonymous alien nor P’Lod appear to have endorsed any 2016 candidates yet.

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SIX TRUTHS

Reclaiming power from those who abuse it often starts with telling the truth. And in "This Is How Authoritarians Get Defeated," MoJo's Monika Bauerlein unpacks six truths to remember during the homestretch of an election where democracy, truth, and decency are on the line.

Truth #1: The chaos is the point.

Truth #2: Team Reality is bigger than it seems.

Truth #3: Facebook owns this.

Truth #4: When we go to work, we're in the fight.

Truth #5: It's about minority rule.

Truth #6: The only thing that can save us is…us.

Please take a moment to see how all these truths add up, because what happens in the weeks and months ahead will reverberate for at least a generation and we better be prepared.

And if you think journalism like Mother Jones'—that calls it like it is, that will never acquiesce to power, that looks where others don't—can help guide us through this historic, high-stakes moment, and you're able to right now, please help us reach our $350,000 goal by October 31 with a donation today. It's all hands on deck for democracy.

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