Stephen Colbert Is Horrified Over Trump’s Forbes Magazine Spanking

“He got spanked, but I feel like I’m being punished.”

Stephen Colbert would rather do anything else than imagine President Donald Trump having sex, but new details published in Mother Jones on Thursday, revealing adult film star Stormy Daniels once claimed she spanked Trump with a copy of Forbes magazine, appear to be forcing the issue.

“Wow, he got spanked, but I feel like I’m being punished,” Colbert said while addressing the report.

Colbert’s horror only grew with the additional revelation that the Forbes magazine Daniels used for their spanking activities featured Trump on the cover. Mother Jones reported that a cover in 2006, when the alleged sexual encounters between Daniels and Trump occurred, does feature Trump and his two children—a visual Colbert acknowledged would “haunt” his audience members’ nightmares.

“I think I speak for Dr. Freud when I say we owe Oedipus an apology.”

You can read more on Trump’s Forbes magazine spanking here.

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ONE MORE QUICK THING:

Our fall fundraising drive is off to a rough start, and we very much need to raise $250,000 in the next couple of weeks. If you value the journalism you get from Mother Jones, please help us do it with a donation today.

As we wrote over the summer, traffic has been down at Mother Jones and a lot of sites with many people thinking news is less important now that Donald Trump is no longer president. But if you're reading this, you're not one of those people, and we're hoping we can rally support from folks like you who really get why our reporting matters right now. And that's how it's always worked: For 45 years now, a relatively small group of readers (compared to everyone we reach) who pitch in from time to time has allowed Mother Jones to do the type of journalism the moment demands and keep it free for everyone else.

Please pitch in with a donation during our fall fundraising drive if you can. We can't afford to come up short, and there's still a long way to go by November 5.

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