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This Week: Bill Clinton

He’s made the big time now: cruising around on Air Force I, hosting coffees left and right, and dealing with tons of fun and exciting scandals. But Bill Clinton’s roots are from a humbler place. Arkansas — a land of rambling dirt roads, the sprawling Ozarks, yipping hillbillies, and big ‘ol watermelons. After living his first seven years in the optimistic town Hope, Clinton spent his formative years in tingly Hot Springs, Arkansas. The town, Clinton’s own mother, Virginia Kelley wrote in her memoir Leading With my Heart, was a place “where gangsters were cool, and rules were made to be bent, and money and power — however you got them — were the total measure of a man.”

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What was Clinton’s goal at Oxford?
To meet the Beatles and have a jam session.
To visit Winston Churchill’s Grave.
To read 100 books per term.
To try marijuana.
To put on the necessary 30 pounds of body fat and swim the English Channel.
What was Clinton’s eleventh grade science project?
He put 100 frogs in a series of smaller and smaller boxes to illustrate the effects of overpopulation.
He slapped a raw hot dog on a shiny sheet of metal and called it a solar hot dog cooker.
He tested the effects of alcohol on the ability of mice to find their way through a maze, and then repeated the experiment on himself and a classmate.
He used fans and a wash basin to make a scale model of the Bermuda Triangle and tried to determine why it was so dangerous.
He made a play-dough city, complete with inhabitants, and melted in under a heat lamp to protest the nuclear arms race.
What is one of Clinton’s all time favorite books?
Hunter S. Thompson’s Fear and Loathing in Las Vegas.
Darrell Huff’s How to Lie With Statistics.
Vladimer Lenin’s What Is to Be Done?.
Erica Jong’s Fear of Flying
James Agee and Walker Evans’ Let Us Now Praise Famous Men.
What were the first words Hillary Rodham heard Bill Clinton speak, as she passed through the student lounge at Yale Law School?
“And Paula cooked me breakfast, too!”
“That Professor Bork sure is conservative.”
“And not only that, we grow the biggest watermelons in the world.”
“I just met this second-year student, Clarence Thomas. He’s got the biggest collection of pornos you ever saw!”
“Then I started coughing and choking. I couldn’t inhale at all. It was awful.”
What did Bill and Hillary do for their honeymoon?
They went to Acapulco, along with Hillary’s parents and brothers.
They organized anti-war demonstrations in Beijing.
They went to Niagara Falls, Ontario, with some draft dodging friends.
They bought a 30-day “Americruiser” pass from Greyhound.
They went nude sun-bathing in the south of France.