Maybe It’s Maybelline (Then Again, Maybe It’s Placenta)

Beauty secrets of the rich and unsqueamish

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Miracle Ingredient: Cow Colostrum
Eva Beauty Epicuren Colostrum Cream; $88/2 oz.
Claim: Bovine postnatal secretion “acts as a super night repair and cell regenerator.”
Don’t hate it because… If you’re skeeved by this one, stop reading now.

Miracle Ingredient: Gold
Chantecaille Nano Gold Energizing Cream; $420/1.7 oz.
Claim: “Consistently replenishes skin’s energy using nanotechnology to safely deliver the power of pure gold.”
Don’t hate it because… A 2006 study found that gold nanoparticles damage skin cells.

Miracle Ingredient: Foreskin
SkinMedica tns Recovery Complex; $145/less than an ounce
Claim: Reverses sun damage, as seen on Oprah
Don’t hate it because… Anti-circumcision activists are way ahead of you.

Miracle Ingredient: Placenta
Plazan Placenta Collagen Mask; $94 each
Claim: Placentas harvested in maternity wards provide “intensive skin rejuvenation.”
Don’t hate it because… Placentas contain estrogen, which has been linked to premature puberty in girls.

Miracle Ingredient: Fetal Cells
Neocutis Bio-Restorative Skin Cream; $130/1.8 oz.
Claim: Cultured skin cells from an aborted fetus “heal wounds without scarring.”
Don’t hate it because… It offends even the most committed pro-choicers.

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Fact:

In-depth journalism that investigates the powerful takes real money and is so damn important right now.But it doesn’t take a Mother Jones investigation to know that billionaires and corporations will never fund the type of reporting (like they do politicians) we do that exists to help bring about change. Instead, our mission-driven journalism is made possible by people power, and has been for 46 years now since our founding as a non-profit.

In “TITLE TK” Monica Bauerlein writes about the perilous moment we’re in, and why it’s so important that we raise $325,000 by the time November’s midterms are decided so we can be ready to throw everything we have at the big issues facing the nation no matter what happens. Please help MoJo’s people-powered journalism with a donation today.

$400,000 to go!

payment methods

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