Inappropriations: Your Tax Dollars at Rest

You’re familiar with federal budget earmarks, but have you heard of “reverse earmarks”? Below, some of the items your tax dollars aren’t allowed to pay for this year.

Fight disinformation: Sign up for the free Mother Jones Daily newsletter and follow the news that matters.


Last December, Congress got around to finishing the federal budget. In addition to the usual raft of earmarks, tucked into the final 1,400-plus-page spending bill were scores of blind items that specify where its $555 billion can’t go. The reverse earmarks ranged from the aggressively anti-pork (targeting the cdc‘s rec room) to the symbolic (cutting funding for torture) to the downright weird (attempting to block anyone from claiming Montana’s unofficial state motto, inserted by Big Sky Senator Max Baucus). Here are some of the things your tax dollars aren’t supposed to pay for in 2008:

Currency Conversion: “None of the funds appropriated in this Act…may be used to redesign the $1 Federal Reserve note.”

Little Green Men: “…any research, development, or demonstration activities related exclusively to the human exploration of Mars.”

Motto Theft: “…to register, issue, transfer, or enforce any trademark of the phrase ‘Last Best Place.'”

epa Pseudoscience: “…to disseminate scientific information that is deliberately false or misleading.”

Prison Flicks: “…to purchase cable television services, to rent or purchase videocassettes, videocassette recorders, or other audiovisual or electronic equipment used primarily for recreational purposes [in federal prisons].”

People Patents: “…to issue patents on claims directed to or encompassing a human organism.”

Taking the Gloves Off: “…to support or justify the use of torture by any official or contract employee of the United States Government.”

Idle Interns: “…to eliminate guided tours of the United States Capitol which are led by employees and interns of offices of Members of Congress and other offices of the House of Representatives and Senate.”

Giant Junkets: “…to send or otherwise pay for the attendance of more than 50 employees from a Federal department or agency at any single conference occurring outside the United States.”

High Times: “…any activity that promotes the legalization of any drug or other substance included in schedule I of the schedules of controlled substances.”

Chinese Chicken: “…allowing poultry products to be imported into the United States from the People’s Republic of China.”

Ron Paul’s Pet Peeve: “…to make any assessed contribution or voluntary payment of the United States to the United Nations if the United Nations implements or imposes any taxation on any United States persons.”

The Next Armstrong Williams: “…to produce any prepackaged news story intended for broadcast or distribution in the United States [unless there’s a disclaimer].”

An Outbreak of Relaxation: “…to provide additional rotating pastel lights, zero-gravity chairs, or dry-heat saunas for [the Centers for Disease Control] fitness center.”

Old Glory Condom

And in case you were wondering where the money must go, the budget requires all federal condom funds to be used “only for the procurement of condoms manufactured in the United States.”

AN IMPORTANT UPDATE

We’re falling behind our online fundraising goals and we can’t sustain coming up short on donations month after month. Perhaps you’ve heard? It is impossibly hard in the news business right now, with layoffs intensifying and fancy new startups and funding going kaput.

The crisis facing journalism and democracy isn’t going away anytime soon. And neither is Mother Jones, our readers, or our unique way of doing in-depth reporting that exists to bring about change.

Which is exactly why, despite the challenges we face, we just took a big gulp and joined forces with The Center for Investigative Reporting, a team of ace journalists who create the amazing podcast and public radio show Reveal.

If you can part with even just a few bucks, please help us pick up the pace of donations. We simply can’t afford to keep falling behind on our fundraising targets month after month.

Editor-in-Chief Clara Jeffery said it well to our team recently, and that team 100 percent includes readers like you who make it all possible: “This is a year to prove that we can pull off this merger, grow our audiences and impact, attract more funding and keep growing. More broadly, it’s a year when the very future of both journalism and democracy is on the line. We have to go for every important story, every reader/listener/viewer, and leave it all on the field. I’m very proud of all the hard work that’s gotten us to this moment, and confident that we can meet it.”

Let’s do this. If you can right now, please support Mother Jones and investigative journalism with an urgently needed donation today.

payment methods

AN IMPORTANT UPDATE

We’re falling behind our online fundraising goals and we can’t sustain coming up short on donations month after month. Perhaps you’ve heard? It is impossibly hard in the news business right now, with layoffs intensifying and fancy new startups and funding going kaput.

The crisis facing journalism and democracy isn’t going away anytime soon. And neither is Mother Jones, our readers, or our unique way of doing in-depth reporting that exists to bring about change.

Which is exactly why, despite the challenges we face, we just took a big gulp and joined forces with The Center for Investigative Reporting, a team of ace journalists who create the amazing podcast and public radio show Reveal.

If you can part with even just a few bucks, please help us pick up the pace of donations. We simply can’t afford to keep falling behind on our fundraising targets month after month.

Editor-in-Chief Clara Jeffery said it well to our team recently, and that team 100 percent includes readers like you who make it all possible: “This is a year to prove that we can pull off this merger, grow our audiences and impact, attract more funding and keep growing. More broadly, it’s a year when the very future of both journalism and democracy is on the line. We have to go for every important story, every reader/listener/viewer, and leave it all on the field. I’m very proud of all the hard work that’s gotten us to this moment, and confident that we can meet it.”

Let’s do this. If you can right now, please support Mother Jones and investigative journalism with an urgently needed donation today.

payment methods

We Recommend

Latest

Sign up for our free newsletter

Subscribe to the Mother Jones Daily to have our top stories delivered directly to your inbox.

Get our award-winning magazine

Save big on a full year of investigations, ideas, and insights.

Subscribe

Support our journalism

Help Mother Jones' reporters dig deep with a tax-deductible donation.

Donate