Some Prison Tips for Bernie Madoff

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So Bernie Madoff’s spending the weekend in a 7-by-8 jail cell, and come June 16, he’s likely to start a lengthy stint in federal prison. Sure, he’ll probably go to a minimum-security facility, but his new surroundings will take some getting used to. Fortunately, Mother Jones is here to help. While researching our package on the prison meltdown last year, we came across all kinds of helpful info for the would-be white-collar convict. A few tips Madoff might find useful: One, when a fellow prisoner talks about “high class,” he’s more likely talking about Hepatitis C than season tickets to the Met. Two, be wary of opaque financial transactions with shady characters: As a former prisoner told us, “If you bum a smoke and the guy with the cigarettes says, ‘Sure, it’s a twofer,’ you should know a twofer means, ‘I give you one for two, so now you owe me.'” And lastly, read the rest of our advice while you still can—Mother Jones is contraband in some joints.

Photo by Flickr user sabeth718 used under a CC License

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Our fall fundraising drive is off to a rough start, and we very much need to raise $250,000 in the next couple of weeks. If you value the journalism you get from Mother Jones, please help us do it with a donation today.

As we wrote over the summer, traffic has been down at Mother Jones and a lot of sites with many people thinking news is less important now that Donald Trump is no longer president. But if you're reading this, you're not one of those people, and we're hoping we can rally support from folks like you who really get why our reporting matters right now. And that's how it's always worked: For 45 years now, a relatively small group of readers (compared to everyone we reach) who pitch in from time to time has allowed Mother Jones to do the type of journalism the moment demands and keep it free for everyone else.

Please pitch in with a donation during our fall fundraising drive if you can. We can't afford to come up short, and there's still a long way to go by November 5.

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