For decades, Americans wondered what was the cause of Florida’s pattern of strange behavior—its catastrophic elections, crazy elected officials, and the existence of Tampa. Well, now we have our answer: Baggy pants and bestiality. But don’t worry, Florida, because your elected officials are totally on it:
Floridians are going to have to start pulling up their pants and stop having sex with animals soon.
It’s up to Gov. Rick Scott to sign off on two bills passed in the Florida Senate and House Wednesday which target droopy drawers and bestiality.
The bestiality bill (SB 344) bans sexual activity between humans and animals and has been championed for years by Sen. Nan Rich, from Sunrise.
It was his pet cause. (Sorry.) Anyway, I’m not sure either of those bills are actually going to do much to fix Florida’s fiascos. A more serious problem might be that, “for years,” an elected official has been spending his energy trying to pass a bill to ban sexual activity between humans and animals.