John Oliver Hates New Year’s Eve Too. Watch Him Show Us How to Successfully Bail on the Worst Holiday

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“New Year’s Eve is like the death of a pet. You know it’s going to happen, but somehow you’re never truly prepared for how truly awful it is. New Year’s Eve is the worst. It combines three of the least pleasant things known to mankind: forced interaction with strangers, being drunk, cold and tired, and having to stare at Ryan Seacrest for five solid minutes, waiting for him to tell you what the time is.”

And with that, John Oliver briefly returned to Last Week Tonight on Sunday to arm us with some helpful tips on how to avoid the ever disappointing shit show that is New Year’s Eve. Watch below: