In April Fools Spoof, Koch Brothers Claim “Clinton” Is on Their Payroll

Just not that Clinton.

Amir Levy/Zuma

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A news site affiliated with the Koch brothers announced in a headline on Friday, “Clinton Confirms She’s on the Koch Payroll.”

The story, of course, was an April Fools hoax.

Kochnews.com published the story, and a disclaimer at the end made clear that it was a joke. The story reads:

Wichita, Kan. – In a tweet Friday morning, Koch Industries, Inc. confirmed that Clinton is indeed receiving funds that link directly back to the CEO of the second largest privately held company in the U.S. – Charles Koch.

“To those who know me best, this doesn’t come as a surprise at all,” Clinton said.

She recently flew to China – on Koch’s tab. Clinton explains why she accepts checks from one of the billionaire Koch Brothers.

“I’ve been solving problems to make things run smoothly across the country – and around the world – for years,” Clinton said. “I actually go to Koch’s headquarters in Wichita a lot. When I’m there, I eat in the café every day. I just love the stir fry.”

Apart from her appetite for Asian cuisine, another little known fact about Clinton is that she was once the mayor of Wesley Chapel, North Carolina, a town currently home to 7,462 residents.

“Even in a small town, politics is a tough job,” Clinton said. “It’s hard to maintain integrity and ethics when you’re surrounded by others who don’t hold the same values you do. But who I am matches Koch’s principles – they just mesh with my personal values.”

Tracey Clinton is an employee of INVISTA, a Koch company. And you’ve been April Fooled.

The piece specifically doesn’t mention Hillary Clinton, choosing instead to refer to “Clinton” throughout. Tracey Clinton, mentioned at the bottom, is employed by a Koch company, and was once the mayor of Wesley Chapel, North Carolina. No word yet from the Hillary Clinton campaign on how funny it thought the gag was.

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WE CAME UP SHORT.

We just wrapped up a shorter-than-normal, urgent-as-ever fundraising drive and we came up about $45,000 short of our $300,000 goal.

That means we're going to have upwards of $350,000, maybe more, to raise in online donations between now and June 30, when our fiscal year ends and we have to get to break-even. And even though there's zero cushion to miss the mark, we won't be all that in your face about our fundraising again until June.

So we urgently need this specific ask, what you're reading right now, to start bringing in more donations than it ever has. The reality, for these next few months and next few years, is that we have to start finding ways to grow our online supporter base in a big way—and we're optimistic we can keep making real headway by being real with you about this.

Because the bottom line: Corporations and powerful people with deep pockets will never sustain the type of journalism Mother Jones exists to do. The only investors who won’t let independent, investigative journalism down are the people who actually care about its future—you.

And we hope you might consider pitching in before moving on to whatever it is you're about to do next. We really need to see if we'll be able to raise more with this real estate on a daily basis than we have been, so we're hoping to see a promising start.

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